friend: i’m getting mcdonalds you want anything?
me: i don’t have money
friend: it’s all good, i’ll pay
When you say something smart and people are shocked
When I find out a cute boy isn’t gay
someone made this and it’s my favorite. now all we need is heart-tail pikachu as an alternate pikachu costume
Me at work
when you order regular fries and you get a few curly fries
Me too, Aragorn. Me too.
im not smokin pot im smokin hot
i want someone who will sit on a rooftop with me at 3 am and shave their head while i shave my head and then hotglue the hair to the roof so the roof will have hair